|
I was watching the Academy Awards earlier tonight, when the military came out via satellite to announce a winner. I saw one of them was a Navy Petty Officer 3rd Class and right away I just thought of my hubby, who is more than a thousand miles away at RTC. It made me start bawling all over again because I miss him so much. It’s so hard not knowing what the heck is going on with him. It will be two weeks tomorrow since he left, and I have yet to receive a single letter from him! I’ve already sent him many, and I can only hope that he’s read them already. I hate not knowing how he is or what he’s doing. Every night I just feel so alone, and I even miss the sound of his snores. I can only assume that he’s safe and doing well, but the fact is that I really don’t know. When I get sad, I tend to bake things. I’ve always liked baking, but it’s sort of therapeutic for me to bake when I get sad. So earlier tonight I baked a batch of brownies. Now I’m attempting to eat the entire thing because there’s no one here to stop me from wallowing in my own sadness. I know it’s not healthy to be like this, and I know some think that I am overreacting because it’s not like he’s dead or anything. Well I say to them that they’re not in my shoes, and have no idea what I’m feeling. The women who are military wives will probably know how I feel; when their husbands are deployed and they are unable to be with them. It wouldn’t be so bad if I was allowed to talk to my husband, at least once or twice a week, but I’m not. He’s not allowed any phone calls, unless they earn them as a reward. Even then, I start thinking what if I’m not available when he’s able to call? What if I’m taking a dump and can’t get to the phone? God this SUCKS!!!
I have my Pedagogy and Professional Responsibilities (PPR) state exam tomorrow afternoon. I’m not too nervous because I think I’m prepared enough for it. I just wish I wasn’t feeling so crappy right now. I’ve started to get the first symptoms of a cold: body aches, runny nose, and a horrible sore throat. It’s the one downside to teaching for me, the person with a weak immune system. This will be the second time I’ve had a bad cold over the past six weeks I’ve been student teaching. Despite the fact that I’m prone to getting sick, I love teaching. I’m currently working with third-graders, and they’re so much fun! All the kids are brilliant, and they do things that make me laugh. Like the whole passing gas thing. The boys are the ones that do that mostly, but their faces are absolutely priceless when they cut one loose! My favorite student by far is a cute boy, who shall remain nameless. He’s our special needs student, because he’s MR, but he’s absolutely adorable! I’m really worried about what’s going to happen next year. I know all of the fourth grade teachers and I don’t think any of them are right for him. I’m afraid they won’t be kind to him, or be there for him when he needs someone. He’s such a special kid, and he deserves a teacher who won’t give up on him. A teacher who understands him and has a special place in their heart for him. Sometimes I wish I could adopt him myself because I’m just so smitten with him! Teaching is great.
|
AboutWelcome to hikari-chan.org! You've stumbled upon the weblog of a 23-year old latina. She is a newly wed, a lover of books, and a recent education graduate. She will mold the minds of young children, in hopes that they do not turn out like our dear President Bush.Flickr      Now ReadingDaily Links |
What if I’m in a meeting or workshop and can’t answer? What if I forget my phone somewhere?! 
Filed under: 
I still remember how scared of me he was the first week that I was there. He wouldn’t sit anywhere near me, and he would hide under the desk the moment he sensed me going near him. He warmed up to me, though, and he lets me ruffle his hair when no one else can (besides my mentor teacher). It’s difficult to understand him at times, because he has trouble with speech. Sometimes he tells us that his “brain hurts because it’s going too fast” and I start to think that we’re pushing him too hard, beyond his limits. He likes participating in everything he can, though, and he tries so hard to do his best. His smile warms me from the inside, all the way to my toes and fingers. I’ve grown attached to that boy, and I can’t tell you how much I’m going to miss him when my student teaching is all over. 
